Surviving As a Parent When Your Child Is in the NICU

There aren’t many things worse for parents to learn when you find out your newborn won’t stay with you the first night or be able to go home with you when you are discharged. Many new parents will face this unfortunate situation and it can be difficult to deal with. I pulled together some tips to help you deal with the stress and emotions during the time.

After Birth
When the baby is brought to the NICU they are stabilized and most of the time you are able see them, but not always interact. It’s important that you talk with the doctor and ask them what level of interaction you can have. This is also an important time for breastfeeding your baby if you plan on doing that, so ask the doctor if you can breastfeed. If not you need to make sure your pump to ensure your milk comes in.

Ask Lots of Questions
Initially when you see your baby in the NICU, things may look foreign. It’s essential you know what’s going on, so you need to ask questions. The important things to know are what the machines and monitors mean, what medications is your baby on and what are the side effects. What ends up happening is when the doctors asks you if you have questions they never come to you, and when your home with your baby the questions come flooding in. So keep a pen and paper and write down your questions as they come to you, as well as any relevant information you hear.

Spend Time With your Baby
Visit your child as much as possible as this is important for bonding and ensuring your child recognizes you when he / she are released; especially if all they know if an incubator for the first month of their life. Spending an hour a day with your baby will also help you jump into the parenting role. Ask the nurse what the feeding schedule is and try to help feed, change diapers and get your practice of what to expect when your baby comes home.

Take a Mental Break
Being in this situation can be mentally and physically draining. You may want to spend every minute there, but sleeping in a chair and eating out of the vending machine will not get you the rest you need. That last thing you want to do is be sick and not be able to be around your baby.

Develop a Support System
Whether you believe it or not, one of the most important things to have during this time is a strong support system. It can be a spouse, parent, brother, sister or best friend. You need someone you can talk to if things become overwhelming. They need to be someone you feel comfortable with as post-partum emotions can get the best of you. This person should also be able to make trips to the hospital with you to handle news you may not be ready for like they have to stay a few extra days or something.

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